Beyond Words

 

Happy National Coffee Day friends! No, this isn’t a blog about coffee; it’s a blog about money. But still, I love coffee so I’ll have a cup while writing about money.

 

When it comes to money, we spend a ton of it on coffee. In fact, if you buy two lattes a week, you’re spending $500 a year on just to-go coffee drinks! Five hundred dollars! And that doesn’t include the coffee you drink at home and most people who frequent coffee shops do so way more often than just twice a week. That’s a lot of dinero on java.

 

But, if you instead invested that money spent on coffee, in 10 years you’d have enough to take a great vacation. Save it for 20 years and you’d be able to pay for one year of college tuition. Yowza! Makes you think twice about coffee to go, doesn’t it?

 

As I said, I love coffee but I’m not a buyer of lattes or cappuccinos at Starbucks or anywhere else. For starters, I can’t stand the size names of Starbucks drinks! Why isn’t the “grande” the large anyway?!

 

 

Great advice but not the advice many Americans are heeding. According to CNBC, nearly 70 percent of American adults have less than $1,000 in their savings accounts and almost half of U.S. families have no retirement accounts savings at all. What gives?

 

In some cases it’s simply a matter of not being able to, other cases lean toward not knowing how or just not choosing to. In the case of the younger generation, the common thinking is “I’ll save more when I make more.” This is not the way to go about it though, because the younger you start saving, the better; even small amounts saved early on are better than no amount at all; and because it’s just often not the case according to Money Expert Kimmie Greene.

 

“Often times what happens is when people make more, they don’t save more, they spend more,” she told CNBC.

 

Money and numbers expert I am not. Far from it as a matter of fact. But it does make perfect sense even to me that the earlier you start saving, the smarter the plan is. When you’re young, it’s even more advantageous because of interest and compound interest in particular, which is basically interest on interest. It is the result of reinvesting interest, rather than paying it out, so that interest in the next period is then earned on the principal sum plus previously-accumulated interest.

 

 

“A penny saved is a penny earned.”

Benjamin Franklin

 

Saving doesn’t have to mean investing in stocks or working with a broker and saving large amounts of money. As Ben Franklin said, even if you save one penny, you’ve earned a penny!  Saving money for retirement is important, but so is saving for a host of different things such as major purchases like homes, college tuition, medical expenses, and other needs. It can also mean living within your means and knowing when enough is enough. As Mary Poppins so eloquently said, “Enough is as good as a feast!

 

But, how much should you be saving right now and how much should you have saved by now? Fidelity Investments says a good rule of thumb is to have the equivalent of your salary saved by age 30 and 10 times your final salary in savings if you want to retire by age 67. Greene’s shared her timeline with CNBC and it’s similar albeit more detailed. It’s still a pretty simple formula.

 

In your 20s have the goal of saving 25 percent of your overall gross pay and make sure your expenses don’t exceed 75 percent of that gross income.

 

By age 30 you should have the equivalent of your annual salary saved. This includes retirement contributions, company matching funds, cash, and investments.

 

After that you should have:

Twice your annual salary saved by age 35

Three times your annual salary saved by age 40

Four times your annual salary saved by age 45

Five times your annual salary saved by age 50

Six times your annual salary saved by age 55

Seven times your annual salary saved by age 60

Eight times your annual salary saved by age 65

 

I think you get the drill. What I like about this plan is that it’s not based on how much you should have saved, but is based on one’s annual salary. Someone making $50,000 a year until their 65-years-old should not be expected to have the same amount saved as someone making $500,000 a year all that time.

 

 

There’s no question it’s tough to do though. We live in a consumer-based society and are constantly fed the belief that not only is bigger better, but more is magnificent! Live like the Kardashians and buy $1,000 phones. Put it all on a credit card and pay a little at a time. Ugh.

 

Then there’s the school of thought studied by many that, “life is too short and I’m going to live for today.” Awesome and have fun doing so, I just hope if your life ends up being long, you’re financially prepared to make up for all that spending and the likelihood that Social Security may not be around to help you out. There’s also insurance costs and medical expenses. My friend’s daughter is a successfully employed woman in her 20s but recently had a medical issue cost her thousands of out-of-pocket dollars despite having decent health insurance. Good thing she had saved her money!

 

If you are looking to save, what are some of the best ways? First off, spend less. Again, I’m no financial expert but finding a reputable financial advisor you trust is a good place to start if you’re looking to make investments and save large amounts. Which brings me to a burning question I’ve had forever: if brokers and investors are so good and so successful, why are they working? But I digress. If your funds aren’t quite on the “financial advisor level,” meet with banker at your local financial institute. A simple savings account may be the way to go. And don’t be afraid to toss spare change in a jar…they really do add up! Something else I read years ago is to save every $5 bill you get. You don’t get them all that often, stocking away $5 doesn’t seem as painful as $20, and take my word for it, they add up too!

 

So maybe the next time you pull up to order a drive-through venti non-fat soy latte, you might think about saving that $5 bill instead of spending it. It might just earn you a king’s ransom.

It gets confusing that fashion industry. We just had New York Fashion Week but don’t be fooled, what was shown on the fall runways is actually what will be worn and sold spring 2018. Think of collections as what will be in store and in stores next season. But, no worries; here’s what you need to know about what to wear this fall. At least color-wise.

 

I’m going by the Pantone Color Institute’s “Fashion Color Report,” which the paint and color experts compile after evaluating what colors were most prominent in fashion week collections. Every season Pantone creates a palette inspired by the hues fashion designers used on the runways and I couldn’t be more thrilled with what colors they advise we should be wearing this fall.

 

In a nutshell, it’s many of the colors that make up both my home décor and my closet racks: a little bit of red and whole lot of camel and gray. I like to think of my design color style as my spice rack: I love a mix of nutmeg, paprika, oregano, and a dash of saffron. Or, maybe it’s my ‘fridge with even amounts of lean beef, tomatoes, spinach, and parmesan! And it goes without saying that both my closet and home are chalk-full of classic blacks and whites.

 

 

The photo above is from JJill and I literally could own every piece and have a closet that could look very similar if I grouped my blacks, whites, and camels like they did.

 

 

Here you have some selections from Rachel Zoe’s pre-Fall 2017 collection and I love every single piece. The black and white. The red. The fringe. The glitter!

 

Pick and choose from both of them and voila; you have right now’s fashionable colors and the official shades of fall.

 

Pantone’s Leatrice Eisman says this palette is “Bookended by a dynamic Grenadine red and a tawny Autumn Maple and leans more to warmth.” I love it. Cue the awesomeness!

 

Let’s look at each of the colors:

 

 

Grenadine is described as a powerful, evocative, and dynamic red. It is a very vibrant tone of red; almost a orangey-red. It’s definitely not a color for the faint of heart but instead a confident color and a self-assured attention-getter.

 

 

Tawny Port takes those reds to new depths and is more elegant and sophisticated. Much like a good port wine, it looks and feels full-bodied and rich.

 

 

Ballet Slipper can go almost bubble-gummy or more similar to recent “it” color, blush. I guess it depends on how broken in the ballerina’s toe shoes are! Pantone describes it as reminiscent of the rosy glow of health and you can consider it soft, safe, and subtle.

 

 

Butterum is a toasty shade evocative of drinking a glass of Butterum by a roaring fire. In my world, it’s a classic camel and one of my all-time favorites.

 

 

Navy Peony is basically your classic navy and is considered a dependable and anchoring shade. It also takes some of the load off of black as the go-to neutral. In fact, many are saying navy is the new black but even though I’ve surprised myself of late at how much navy I now have, it will never take the place of black in my closet. It just won’t.

 

 

Neutral gray, however, could. I love me a yummy gray and love that you can wear it as a muted pop of accent or as head-to-toe classiness. You can also easily glam it up by making it a more sparkly silver. When I picture the color I picture something fuzzy and warm like velvet, suede, or cashmere.

 

 

Shaded Spruce is a meshing of teal and emerald to me but Pantone says it’s designed to make you think of the forest and the protectiveness of evergreens. I’m not feeling the forest but do like the color as I like green in general and have always thought of it as “God’s color.” But be careful when pairing it with any of the above reds and don’t go 1980’s jewel tones on me.

 

 

Golden Lime is a yellow-green shade and that leans toward chartreuse. It’s never been a color I gravitate toward as I have olive skin. If I was a betting woman, I’d ante up that it will never make it to my closet. Just saying.

 

 

Marina in the only true cool color in the palette and it brings with it a freshness and brightness. It’s very periwinkle to me and is utterly yowza! I love it! We all need a little “vitamin sea” in our lives and Marina is the color that will bring it.

 

 

Autumn Maple is a quintessential autumn color but the new version has a tawny, russet hue that keeps it fresh yet classic. Close your eyes and smell the maple syrup!

 

So there you have it: a brief roadmap on the colors you might be seeing a lot of right now and the ones you can confidently use to create a wardrobe. Be smart though, consider what looks good on you, your budget, and if you really and truly need any of it. Truth be told, I could easily not buy one new thing this fall and have the Fall 2017 color palette pretty much covered. It’s still fun to talk about it though, right? Which ones are your favorites?

 

I’m one of those who if asked “would you go back to college today?” I answer not “yes,” but “hell yes!” What was not to love? You are learning, are living with friends, and have fun activities available 24-7. For me, college literally changed my life. I played hard but studied hard, had the time of my life and made life-long friends. To this day, I take a trip once-a-year with four college girlfriends. We’re on our 15^th year now. With that being said, it naturally comes as no surprise to me that all things college are tres chic right now.

 

 

To prove this, look no further than Graduate Hotels, owned by former Auberge Resorts executive Ben Weprin. The 39-year-old entrepreneur’s AJ Capital Partners has launched the group of properties in college towns across America and they are not only trendy, they are trending.

 

Currently located in Ann Arbor, Michigan; Oxford, Mississippi; Athens, Georgia; Madison, Wisconsin; Tempe, Arizona; Berkeley, California; Charlottesville, Virginia; Lincoln, Nebraska; Richmond, Virginia; Bloomington, Indiana; and Minneapolis, each property is customized to be in sync with the local university’s vibe.

 

For example, in former home of author William Faulkner and current home of Ole Miss, Oxford’s Graduate Hotel’s room keys resemble Ole Miss ID cards and the concierge desk is a bookshelf. Weprin is currently a “big man on campus” in the hospitality industry and explained his school of thought to “Town and Country” magazine.

 

“Everyone goes back to their college and they’re proud of the place,” he says. “Why shouldn’t the visit to college be something memorable too?”

 

I concur, and to do this Weprin and his team scour local antique shops and flea markets to find items that inspire décor. Each site celebrates a youthful optimism and cultivates spirit and memory making. Best of all, they are affordable and yet they boast five-star touches.

 

These all remind me of hotels we stayed at when my daughter and friends did college tours during her junior year of high school. We stayed at small hotels, many of them right near campus and often owned and managed by the university. I particularly remember The Hotel at Auburn University and The Inn at Carnall Hall in Fayetteville. They were such treats to stay at and I highly recommend researching similar sites at any universities you may be touring in the future.

 

 

It’s probably only a matter of time before LSU, Clemson, Bama, Mizzou, and Texas Tech have Graduate Hotels in their cities, but until then, they can at least lay claim to some of the country’s only country-club-like amenities having to do with water.

 

All of them have actual floating rivers on campus. Yes, lazy rivers! Can you even imagine? Let’s see, go to class, go study, then go float the river. I’m in! At SMU in Dallas, students don’t have an actual floating river but they do have a tanning pool shallow enough to allow sitting in chairs and chaise lounges comfortably. If I’m the admissions director at those schools, these perks are front and center in all recruitment materials.

 

Founded by two Ivy League alums, Hillflint is right on top of the collegiate trend. The company is the place to go if old school knit sweaters are what you’re looking for. Crafted to remind customers of happy college memories, their product line is like taking a trip back in time. No trendy metallics, flashy bling, or catchy phrases, just simple block letters and striped arms.

 

The owners founded the company after graduating college, and are quick to admit they did so because they wanted to offer something to friends that would outlive souvenir tee-shirts and something more indelible, just like the memories of their college years were. Today 120 universities allow their logos and trademarks on Hillflint sweaters with styles ranging from Stadium to Tailgating and a host of others that definitely make the grade.

 

The fashion industry has of course taken note of the current “college is cool” trend. Or did they set the trend? Either way, cardigans were all over runways, including those of Gucci, Altuzarra, Chloe, and Miu Miu, which means retailers coast-to-coast will be stocking them this fall and winter.

 

A fashion favorite for years, the cardigan was created by none other than Coco Chanel. In 1925, the style maven was frustrated with how crew neck sweaters ruined her hair and felt tight, so she revamped them and designed the first timeless cardigan. I wonder if the buttons were pearls.

 

So as you enjoy a good college football game this weekend, whether in a stadium seat or a living room chair, know that all things college are too cool for school right now. Boomer!

It’s called TV’s biggest night but this year, I wouldn’t know.  Truth be told I didn’t watch a second of last night’s Emmy Awards, but a girl loves her some fashion so I did check out Red Carpet wrap-ups. Funny thing happened on the way to my voting though: I didn’t know half the people mentioned in article after article, blog after blog. Tessa Thompson? No idea. Issa Rae? Not a clue. Natalie Dyer? Dying to know who the girl in the gorgeous green gown was. But know or not know, here are my no’s and my say yes to that Emmy dress. 

 

Natalie Dyer in oh-so-flattering high-neck green Vera Wang. Those pleats! The simplicity! the train! Per-fection.

 

 

 

Also in Vera Wang and a winner in my eyes was Issa Rae. Her asymmetrical tomato red Wang had just enough flash to make it interesting but simple enough to stay classy. Beautiful dress. Beautiful lady.

 

 

 

Some hated Tessa Thompson’s multi-colored Rosie Assoulin halter dress, but she kinda crushed it and I kinda liked it.

 

 

 

Some also didn’t give a round of applause to the short Stella McCartney blue blazer dress Reese Witherspoon chose, but I thought it was a classy yet edgy choice. Loved the matching suede pumps too and if I had those legs I’d choose short too! I might have pulled her hair back into a pony though.

 

 

 

No idea who she is but Kiernan Shipka looked flowy, airy, and a tad Greecian in a speckled Miu Miu. Up close, the detail and fabric were dreamy.

 

 

 

Two names forever on any of my “favorite” lists: Mandy Moore and Carolina Herrera and they didn’t disappoint. Moore was pure awesomeness in her black and white tiered Herrera and her hair and make-up were on point.

 

 

Claire Foy served fashion notice in her off-the-shoulder black Oscar de la Renta jumpsuit and I loved everything about it except the rope embellishment. “The Queen” would have been perfectly royal without it. I would have liked a smile too rather than that stiff upper lip.

 

 

Feathers are rarely a fashion favorite of mine, but something about Zoe Kravitz’ colorful feathery Dior Haute Couture stole my heart.

 

 

 

Nothing “little” about Julie Bowen’s side-ruffled Albert Ferretti black dress. The cap sleeves were so flattering and her hair and jewelry were beyond perfect. This funny girl consistently kills it fashion-wise. Love her style and loved last night’s look thank you very much.

 

 

 

And a big shout out to Sterling K. Brown who won Best Lead Actor in a Drama Series for his moving and amazing role in “This Is Us.” Not only does he win my best actor award, he also wins my “best dress male” award for keeping it traditional and classy. Nothing tops a man in a simple tux. And BTW, if you want to hear something touching, Google the part of his acceptance speech that didn’t make the telecast. The guy is a class act. Hands down.

 

And finally, my worst dressed. No pictures needed.

 

So many raved about Jessica Beal’s look but it did nothing for me. She’s always just one of those who I think is gorgeous but never quite cuts it on a Red Carpet. I guess when you have JT on your arm, who cares, right?

 

Debra Messing may be coming back as the beloved Grace in “Will and Grace,” but her eggplant dress last night was just a mess and anything but graceful.

 

Sofia Vergara looked stunning in her white Mark Zunino, but it felt a bit bridal to me and do we really need to see Vergara in yet another mermaid gown?

 

Robin Wright was just a no. No to the saggy-boobs dress and no to the hair. Claire Underwood would be appalled.

 

I don’t know who Ariel Winter is but I do know she tried too hard to be sexy and to be noticed. So did Evan Rachel Wood in her “too many details” white menswear look.

 

Did I miss anyone? Do you agree or disagree? Please do tell!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Country singer Miranda Lambert had a song a few years back called “The House That Built Me” and it’s one of my top 10 favorite songs of all time. It tells the story of an adult woman going back to her childhood home and asking the current owners if she can take a look around. They lyrics are poignant and the tune is haunting. It’s a beautiful song:

 

 

I know they say you can’t go home again.

I just had to come back one last time.

Ma’am I know you don’t know me from Adam.

But these hand prints on the front steps are mine.

Up those stairs, in that little back bedroom

Is where I did my homework and I learned to play guitar.

And I bet you didn’t know, under that live oak

My favorite dog is buried in the yard.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it

This brokenness inside me might start healing.

Out here it’s like I’m someone else,

I thought that maybe I could find myself

If I could just come in I swear I’ll leave.

Won’t take nothing but a memory From the house that built me.

 

 

This past week my husband and I went back to the town that built him, East Aurora, NY.  The“village,” as they call it, is a picture-perfect Norman Rockwallish colonial town on the outskirts of blue collar Buffalo and it offered him the best of both worlds: safe and charming yet full of hard-working people. It made him who he is.

 

The birthplace of President Millard Fillmore, the historic Roycroft design movement, and Fisher-Price toys, EA has history and charm. Mr. Fisher and Mr. Price actually started their toy company in a local garage and kids from the village were put on the boxes. This photo is my husband on the snap beads box.

 

His was a childhood filled with playing in the park and riding bikes. His home away from home was the East Aurora Boys Club. (Now the Boys AND Girls club! Oh the horror!) The club has stood the test of time and while we were in town it had a ceremony inducting a few locals, including a good friend of ours, into the Wall of Fame. When I first heard about us attending, I thought “but I don’t want to do that!” Am so very glad I did.

 

The place was packed and the speeches were moving. So much inspiration. One inductee gave a couple who took him into their home as a child a bowl of candy. Lifesavers. As the emcee noted, “At the boys club we learned to win but we also learned to lose. We learned self-respect and to respect others.” These traditions and values continue to be taught today.

 

In today’s fractured world, one big glaring splinter is the appreciation of generations. The Greatest Generation just can’t understand the morals and values of today’s Generation X. Millennials look at their Baby Boomer parents like they’re something out of Game of Thrones. But, if we step back and really think about it, yes we might have different opinions, but we can also learn something from each other. This is where places like the boys club come in. Generation after generation is guiding the youth of the town and even though checkers and chess may not be as popular as video games in the game room, pick-up basketball is still king. Best of all, it’s organized by the kids and not all of them get a trophy.

 

Walking to mass on Sunday (yes, walking to mass…so cool!) I couldn’t help but think how fortunate the kids in East Aurora are to grow up where they do. They have all the high-tech they need but they also have the low-tech past staring them in the face everywhere they go. Nostalgia carried me all during our visit and it continued as I listened to the priest’s sermon. He noted that when we are young, we are gaining things. We gain knowledge, physical growth, and new emotions. But, as we age we start losing things. Our health, our memory, our friends and family. We should never stop learning though. I learn so much from the little three-year-old buddies I teach and vice versa. Ten-year-olds at the boys club are learning the same things their grandpas did. Old teaches the young and the young teach the old.

 

Another place this concept is alive and well is at Vidler’s Store in East Aurora. It’s a multi-story, old-school five-and-dime that is a true treasure. Every time we go back, I have to go to Vidler’s. Inside you’ll find everything from toys of generations past to the latest in home décor. I spend literally at least an hour there as do the hordes of people visiting it daily. Yes, ceramic cookware is cool, but so are paint-by-number sets. In life, we need both.

 

The house that built my husband, his childhood home, is at the top of this blog and is walking distance from Vidler’s, the church, and the boys club. His mom is in a nursing home now and I so wanted to knock on the door and ask the new owners if I could touch the place and feel it. I never got the nerve.

 

In her song, Lambert sings “You leave home, you move on, and you do the best you can. I got lost in this whole world and forgot who I am.” Going to the boys club ceremony, walking the creaky aisles of Vidler’s, staying with my brother and sister-in-law, and attending my husband’s 40^th high school reunion, reminded me that despite moving to Boston and eventually Texas, thankfully my husband hasn’t forgotten who he is and where he’s from. I’m pretty sure he never will and it’s something to sing about.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I love photographs but I generally don’t like having my photo taken. It’s a rare occasion when I actually like how I look in a photo. But, this is the time of year when you almost can’t avoid being in photographs. Graduations. Weddings. Vacations. All of them are picture-perfect circumstances to take photos.

 

To make matters worse, we are living in the age of social media sites where celebs and friends alike look fabulous. But think about it, how many shots were needed to get that one beauty and do you really think anyone would post an unflattering photo on Facebook or Instagram? And, unless you are a celebrity who has access to an on-call glam squad, assistant to capture all your fabulous moments, and professional airbrushing, you’re never going to look like a Housewife of anywhere or a model of anything.

 

But don’t worry; there are some things you can do to feel confident and beautiful in your photos. And guess what? They’re all free!

 

Strike A Pose

There are a couple of key things you can do to look your best in a photo. First off, stand tall and stand proud. Posture goes a long way so keep your head up, your neck long, and your shoulders back. Susan Street of “Susan After Sixty” and seen in the photo above, recommends imagining a string holding your head high and your body aligned beneath it. Nothing says “bad photo” or “no confidence” like a slouch so straighten up and smile right!

 

You never want to face the camera head on. Your goal is to create angles with your body…natural angles ladies. Too much posing looks like, well, too much posing. Keep in mind that whatever is closest to the camera will look the biggest so position those hands and feet right unless you want the impression of man hands and boats.

 

Speaking of hands; keep them relaxed. Street suggests pretending like your nails are wet. I also like the suggestion of making space between your arms and your body. Don’t go overboard though. Just a small and almost indiscriminate placing of your arms away from your body will prevent your torso from looking larger than it is. Another good tip is to rest your hands on top of your thighs. Again, stay relaxed though. Stiff equals bad.

 

The pose many are using today is the “hand on the hip” pose. For me, unless you’re 30 or younger this pose makes you look like you’re trying too hard to be 30 or younger. The pose is supposed to define your waist but if you don’t have said waist, it could be a waste of time. Millennials and sorority girls, hand on hip away. More mature ladies, steer away.

 

Now for the feet. Posing straight at the camera with arms straight down and feet together will make even the smallest of bodies look bigger. Instead, think “twist and shift.” Twist your body at the waist, turn one hip toward the camera, and shift your weight onto a slightly back positioned foot. Then, angle the foot that’s forward away from your body and turn your face toward the camera. Got it? I know awkward, right? Instead, just think:

 

One foot in front of the other or out to the side.

Weight on back foot.

Front toe pointed away from body.

Twist at waist.

Arms away from body.

Hands resting on thighs.

Turn face toward camera.

Shoulders back.

Tilt head.

Chin up.

SMILE!

 

 

Group Counseling

For group shots, I like to position myself at the end of a group. This way I can “edit” half of myself out of the shot if I want. But, this strategy doesn’t work when someone else posts or prints the photo without your edits! Your best bet is to stand slightly behind someone and at an angle. It also helps to avoid standing next to someone the same size as you. You will rarely find me front and center in a group photo.

 

If you’re hoping for a frameable photo, two other things you need to consider are light and background. We all want the beautiful beach behind us as we sit having an umbrella drink, but if the brightest part of a shot is behind you, those umbrella drinks and everyone drinking them will be silhouettes and the water will be super bright. On the other hand, if the light is directly above you, you will have unflattering shadows all over your face. Your best bet is to always face the light source.

 

As for where you stand and what’s behind you, unless it really doesn’t matter and you just want a quick snap, look for a background that contrasts with what you are wearing. If you’re wearing black, you probably don’t want to stand in front of a black wall. In most cases, the key in backgrounds is simple is best.

 

Where a camera is is equally important. The more eye-level you are with the camera, the better. Even better is to look slightly up toward the photographer and never, ever down toward the camera. This is something very important when it comes to taking a good selfie. Those, my friends, are a whole other story.

 

Selfie Confidence

I generally don’t take selfies and if I do, I’m probably with my daughter or a friend and they impatiently grabbed my phone from me and quickly snapped one. Similar to throwing a Frisbee or turning a cartwheel, I cannot take a selfie for the life of me. My favorite selfies are the ones with filters on Snapchat and Instagram where I can put rabbit ears or glamorous sunglasses on me. You will never see me post a simple selfie of myself.

 

Maybe you’re like me or maybe you just want to get better at taking a selfie so here are some tips:

 

Most selfie “experts” (it’s a sad day when there really are such things) recommend taking them in natural lighting and to never use a flash. If you are outdoors, try to have the sun behind you so you get that “halo” effect or block the sun with your head.

 

There’s probably no bigger selfie (and self-absorbed) expert than Kim Kardashian, and according to “Allure” magazine, Kim K’s two tips are chin down and camera up. Where you hold the phone is indeed crucial and a good rule-of-thumb is to hold it so the bottom of the phone is level with your eyes. Never snap away with your face straight toward the camera. Instead, think angles once again and turn or tilt your head to the side.

 

As silly as it sounds, if you know you’re going to be taking selfies, practice doing so in the privacy of your own home. Move and tilt your head and shoulders in a variety of ways to see which positions are most flattering on you and think natural.

 

Practice makes perfect when it comes to smiling too. If I smile too big, I look awkward and my eyes become small. Tyra Banks may be all about “smizing,” but I more prefer “soft smiles.”  Whatever works for you, natural is always best.

 

True expert photographers live by the “rule of thirds,” which can be helpful when taking a selfie. It’s all about composing your shot and this photo by Kristi Randal and from improvephotography.com is the perfect example of how to place your face in the top-right or top-left corner of the frame. They also suggest keeping your eye line one-third down from the top of the frame and off to one side rather than putting yourself dead center in the middle of the frame. As you’re taking the pic, ask yourself: do you want an attractive selfie or a driver’s license photo?

 

As for apps and filters, yes, use them, just make sure you keep things looking natural. Your goal is for someone to think “what a great or interesting photo,” not “I wonder how she really looks!”

 

Finally, even if you’re uncomfortable as someone snaps away, stay away from cliché hand or arm moves. Relax and don’t overthink a selfie. Listen to “Allure” when it writes “A trying too hard selfie will never be a good one.”

 

Have fun, strike a confident pose, and you too will be picture perfect!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s officially summer as of last Thursday and with temperatures hovering at 100 where I live, it’s time to revisit ways to beat the heat. I posted this piece last year, thought “why reinvent the wheel,” and so I’m doing something I’ve never done (but might think about doing it more often): I’m reposting it!

 

When it’s so hot outside you just want to play it cool inside in the air conditioning rather than playing anything outside. But, some of us have no choice as our jobs or daily lives have us outside a lot. What to do when that is the case? Wear sunscreen, cover your head, and drink lots of water.

 

 

MADE IN THE SHADE

Let’s start with sunscreen. Do you really need it, what SPF is best, and how much should you use? First of all, yes, you need it. We all need it. Daily. Even in the shade. In fact, a new study found that 78 percent of people who used only an umbrella on a sunny beach day burned but only 25 percent of those who used SPF got sunburned. First of all, who doesn’t use sunblock on the beach? Secondly, don’t let the shade fool you. You will still get burned in the shade because it doesn’t block UV light.

 

As for SPF, higher isn’t the key, how you apply it and how often you apply it is. This doesn’t mean you should opt only for SPF 15 for a week at the beach, but it also doesn’t mean SPF 50 is the only way to go. According to “Good Housekeeping” magazine testing labs, people tend to apply only about one-third the amount of sunscreen needed to achieve the SPF level of that bottle. Think about it, if you’re using SPF 15 but doing a lousy job of applying it, you’re really using way less than SPF 15 and will most likely get sunburned.

 

We get sunburned because UV radiation reaches the earth in the form of UVB and UBA rays, the first one being the cause of skin cancer. Sunscreen uses SPF, which refers to the amount of UVB protection in that bottle.

 

So what exactly is SPF? If you thought the three letters stood for something scientific and formal, you’re wrong. They stand simply for Sun Protector Factor, which is a measure of a sunscreen’s ability to prevent the sun’s rays from damaging your skin.

 

As for what level blocks how much, sunscreens with higher SPF ratings block more UVB rays but none offer 100 percent protection. Here’s how it works. On average, it takes around 20 minutes for someone’s unprotected skin to start turning red when exposed to the sun. If that person had applied SPF 15 sunscreen, theoretically it would prevent their skin from getting burned 15 times longer.

 

Here’s another way to look at it. An SPF 15 product is said to block around 94 percent of harmful UVB rays while SPF 30 filters almost 97 percent of the rays, meaning 3.3 percent reach the skin. On the other hand, SPF 60 blocks 98 percent, allowing only 1.7 percent to reach the skin. But, opting for high SPF products sometimes give us a false sense of security that diminishes when we don’t apply that sunscreen correctly.

 

The best advice is to apply sunscreen liberally before going outside and then again once you’re outdoors. Be sure to hit all exposed areas of the body, spread evenly, and most importantly: reapply at least every two hours. This is crucial!

 

And if you’re thinking “but sunscreens aren’t healthy,” stop right there. Sunburns aren’t healthy either, and since ingredients need to be treated in chemicals for effectiveness, there is no such thing as a truly “natural” sunscreen. Buy them, use them, and be on your way.

 

STAY COOL

Funny thing happened on the way to the beach: hearing my mom tell me again and again that that “30 percent of your body heat escapes out of your head so put a hat on in the cold.” Well, if that’s the case, why in the world would I want to cover my head at the beach or while playing golf? Is this why many cultures carry umbrellas when outside?

 

Perhaps, but sunshine on a hot day will actually make the outside of your head hotter…you know, your hair and your skin. In this case, a hat won’t keep your body heat in, it will keep the outside heat out. By keeping the sun’s hot rays off your head, you will stay cooler than if those rays were beating directly down on you. So, in the cold wear a hat and in the heat wear a hat. Easy peasy.

 

Okay, what about visors? Are they effective too? A lot depends on what your activity is going to be.

 

If you’re going to be at the pool or on the beach and occasionally cooling off in the water, a hat is a good choice. But, if you’re running or playing something like tennis, a visor may be a smarter option. According to triathlete.com and coach/trainer Mat Steinmetz, hats may protect your scalp from radiant heat, but the fabric in them can also lessen evaporative and convection cooling.

 

With both hats and visors, pick white ones with dark under-brims if possible and always opt for those that are lightweight, breathable, and absorb moisture but don’t interfere with the evaporative effect of sweating. Steinmetz recommends a full mesh hat that allows air to pass through.

 

The other role hats in the heat play are to block our faces, necks, and even chests from harmful rays. Wide-brimmed hats on the beach are not only stylish but smart. Your face is one of the most sun-sensitive areas of your body so making sure the sun doesn’t see it is the goal.

 

 

DRINK UP

Don’t wait until you’re out in the heat to start drinking water. Everyone should drink lots of water every day, but if you know you’re going to be in the sun for an extended period of time, it’s even more important to hydrate before, during, and after. Why?

 

Because when it’s hot you sweat more and when you sweat more you could become dehydrated. In fact, heat travels through our bloodstream to our skin, resulting in sweat. As that sweat evaporates, we cool off and return to a safe body temperature but lose body moisture along the way. Our bodies function best at a certain temperature but when we get too hot, they need to cool down. Sweat evaporating on our skin can tends to cool us down but we need to replenish all that moisture oozing out of our pores. Drinking water also helps prevent muscle cramping, dizziness, heat exhaustion, and even heat stroke.

 

Many consider water our most essential nutrient. A person can live quite a while without food but for only days without water. Water in our bodies supplies nutrients, removes waste, maintains blood circulation and body temperature, increases metabolism, and carries heat away from our internal organs.

 

In addition to drinking lots of water, you might also want to hydrate with sports drinks that contain electrolytes and carbohydrates. You should also avoid alcohol and eat hydrating and potassium-rich fruits like watermelon, berries, peaches, nectarines, and bananas. An easy way to gauge if you are well-hydrated is to check your urine. If it’s pale, not cloudy or dark, you’re good to go!

 

So there’s my top 3 ways to beat the heat, or at least survive it. Be cool everyone!

 

 

 

 

 

There’s a certain food making the rounds of many a table today. It’s made from garbanzo beans and is of Arabic origins. You’ve probably had some in the last month or so, if not more recently. Do you know what I’m talking about?

 

If you said hummus, you’re right! Didn’t know you were eating garbanzo beans? Thought it came from Whole Foods not a whole other country? Well, say a big “hmmmmm” and read on about hummus!

 

If you know anything about hummus, you might know that it is made from chickpeas, which are also known as garbanzo beans! What you may not know is that “hummus” is actually an Arabic word that means “chickpea.” So what exactly is hummus though?

 

Hummus History

In its purest form, hummus is a dip or spread made from mashed chickpeas and blended with tahini, olive oil, lemon juice, garlic, and salt. Extremely popular today because of its low-fat content and nutritious properties, hummus has actually been around for centuries and is one of the oldest known prepared foods. But is it Greek? Middle Eastern? Jewish?

 

Many cultures and regions around the world claim hummus as their own, but its exact origin has never been completely verified. Chickpeas, on the other hand, are another story. Vegetables that have been cultivated and grown throughout the Middle East and India for thousands of years, chickpeas were one of the earliest crops in Mesopotamia and were a common food on the streets of ancient Rome according to Top Food Facts. Some even claim they were known to grow in the gardens of Babylon. And if that’s not enough history for your appetite, chew on this little nugget: Plato and Socrates both mentioned chickpeas in their writings. Get out!

 

Arabs and Greeks are equally adamant that they “own” hummus, and even Israelis have joined the debate. No one really knows for sure, but the earliest known hummus recipes date back to 13^th century Cairo and most historians and foodies say hummus most likely originated in Egypt. But, does it really matter?

 

It actually makes sense that multiple cultures were involved in the creating of hummus. Chickpeas have always grown abundantly in the Middle East and the Greeks and Egyptians were trade partners for centuries so many of their dishes intermix. In addition to hummus, baklava, the famous Greek dessert, is also made in the Middle East.

 

Today hummus is enjoyed the world over as an appetizer or dip most commonly served with pita or other flatbreads. It can also serve as a side dish or accompaniment to falafel or chicken and fish dishes. Common garnishes include chopped tomatoes and cucumbers, parsley, red peppers, onions, and pine nuts. Cruise down any grocery store aisle and you’ll come across hummus in a humongous assortment of flavors and styles. My favorite is the roasted red pepper.

 

In Egypt still, hummus is a popular dip while in Israel it is regarded a national food and is a common part of almost daily meals as its ingredients follow Jewish dietary laws. The spread is equally popular among Arabs who are adamant that the word is not only of Arabic origins, but the dish itself is too. It has long been an Arabic staple food served at breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

 

Me? I like it as an appetizer but then again, I could live on appetizers. I haven’t always liked hummus though. It was the texture that had me questioning its appeal, but once I found the roasted red pepper flavor, I was sold. Now I love it.

 

Healthy Hummus

What many love about hummus, besides its flavor, is its nutritional value. Chickpeas are chalk-full of fiber, protein, potassium, B vitamins, iron, vitamin C, folate, and manganese. Equally impressive is that it is low in calories, carbohydrates, and sugar. Most of the fat found in hummus comes from the tahini and olive oil that go into the making of it. Tah-what?

 

Tahini. Also based on an Arabic word meaning “to grind,” tahini is made from ground sesame seeds and is sometimes served as a dip on its own. It’s also a major ingredient of hummus, baba ghanoush, and halva. Very common in the foods of the eastern Mediterranean region, the Middle East, China, Korea, Japan, and India, tahini comes in either liquid or paste form. In Greece it is spread on bread and topped with jam while Israel considers it a staple food.

 

Like chickpeas, tahini has excellent nutritional value. It is a great source of calcium, manganese, the amino acid methionine, and healthy omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids. When made from raw sesame seeds rather than from roasted seeds, it is even lower in fat.

 

So there you have it, the history of hummus. Who knew?

 

Now it’s time to make some hummus. I came across this photo on Ina Garten’s “Barefoot Contessa” Instagram feed and just knew it would be fabulous. She called it “Israeli Vegetable Salad on Hummus” but I just call it yummy. Basically chopped tomatoes, cucumbers, and salad greens like arugula served on top of hummus. So easy!

 

 

And on that note, here’s an easy basic hummus recipe from Epicurious:

 

Ingredients

2 cups drained and well-cooked canned chickpeas, liquid reserved

½ cup tahini paste

¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil

2 cloves garlic, peeled

Salt and pepper to taste

1 T cumin or paprika

Juice of 1 lemon

Chopped fresh parsley leaves for garnish

 

Preparation

Put all ingredients except the parsley a food processor and process.

Add reserved chickpea liquid as need to produce a smooth puree.

Serve drizzled with olive oil and sprinkled with spices and parsley.

 

Recipe author, Mark Bittman of “The Best Recipes in the World,” says chickpeas are among the best legumes around and surprisingly, though generally not a big fan of canned beans, but for whatever reason canned chickpeas are not bad at all so he always keeps some on hand to make a batch of this at the last minute. He also adds that you can make hummus without tahini; but it will be a little looser and less complex tasting but still good. For my two-cent’s worth, I would totally leave out the cumin as I’m not a fan, and I might add some red pepper and crushed garlic on top.

 

Experiment and have fun with it and be ever so grateful to those little chickpeas!

 

 

Have you heard of MCM? It’s short for Man Crush Monday on social media and it’s the distant cousin of WCW, or Woman Crush Wednesday. There are some women out there who I find absolutely adorbs, but a crush? Hmmmm…not so much. Men? They’re another story.

 

How do you define handsome? What constitutes hot or sexy? What about attractive? They all probably describe someone you might have a crush on or had a crush on at one point in your life. I distinctly remember having a crush on Stanley in junior high, Leonard in high school, and cute cowboy Carey stole my heart and then broke it in college. We’ve all been there but crushes can be so much fun!

 

So, without further ado, who made my MCM list today? Drum roll and in no particular order but by profession, they are…

 

Hollywood

 

Kevin Costner. I’ve loved him since way back and love how he’s aged so well. My idea of a man’s man.

 

 

Matt Damon. I fell in love with him in “Goodwill Hunting” and still find him so cute. I met him at our former golf club and he was nice as can be. That’s always a bonus.

 

 

Vince Vaughn. Not classically handsome but your every guy and so darn funny. Who doesn’t love humor in a man?

 

 

Bruce Willis. Something about him just makes me smile and long before Die Hard and Demi, he was so likable in “Moonlighting” many moons ago.

 

 

Taylor Kinney. Probably the most beautiful eyes in Hollywood. What was Lady Gaga thinking when she walked away from this?

 

 

Ashton Kutcher. I see Ashton and I see male model. But I also see goofball. A male model who’s goofy. I’m on board.

 

 

Olivier Martinez. “Unfaithlful” with Diane Lane. Nuff said. Schmuck in the movie and reportedly a schmuck in real life though.

 

 

Mark Wahlberg. Not classically handsome, but I love what’s inside Mr. Wahlberg. A true family man with abs of steel, doesn’t take himself too seriously and goes to mass almost daily. What’s not to love?

 

 

Cary Grant. Old school handsome. They don’t make them like this anymore.

 

 

Paul Newman. Near the top of my list year in and year out, Mr. Newman defined charm and class.

 

 

Channing Tatum. Just hot. That’s all. And I’ve never even seen “Magic Mike.”

 

 

George Clooney. He’s got that ornery smile and just seems like tons of fun. Travel the world with George Clooney? I’m in.

 

 

Sam Shepherd. This blast from the past hasn’t aged as well as I’d hoped, but in “Frances,” “The Right Stuff,” and “Steel Magnolias” he had that mysterious right stuff down pat.

 

 

Denzel Washington. Just a class act and a handsome one to boot. Everything about Denzel oozes authenticity and appeal…sex appeal.

 

 

     

Patrick Dempsey. The hair. The smile. The lovable roles in “Made of Honor” and “Sweet Home Alabama.” On that note, let’s add Josh Lucas, his sweet home sweet cast mate to the mix. No wonder Reese had such a hard time choosing!

 

 

Sports

 

             

Tennis players Tommy Haas, Feliciano Lopez, and Patrick Rafter. I think their photos speak for themselves.

 

 

Tim Tebow. Such a handsome, God-fearing man. Am still waiting for him to marry my daughter.

 

 

Kirk Herbstreit. ESPN “Gameday’s” cutie pie. Love me some Kirk.

 

 

David Pollack. Herbstreit’s “Gameday” colleague, Pollack always seems to be smiling and is equally as charming as Kirk.

 

 

Tom Brady. Hate his team. Love his face.

 

 

Adam Scott. This golfer from down under is downright handsome.

 

 

Mark Sanchez. Not the most successful of NFL quarterbacks but looks-wise he scores big.

 

 

Music

 

The Edge. U2 guitarist, real name David Howell Evans, is rock ‘n roll sexy. Watch him in the “With or Without You” video and you’ll see what I see. The lead singer and drummer of his band aren’t bad either. Sorry Adam Clayton; but you’re one heck of a bass player.

 

 

Joe Perry. Lead guitarist of Aerosmith, Perry will forever be my “run away with sleazy rock star” crush.

 

 

Jason Aldean. Not country music’s most traditionally handsome artist, Aldean has the prettiest eyes in Nashville and in my eyes, puts pretty boys like Luke Bryan to shame. Blake Shelton? Cute but no mystery to him. Eric Church on the other hand, yes please.

 

 

Jon Bon Jovi. In my former life as an entertainment publicist, I met JBJ and couldn’t get past his chiseled face and dimpled chin. Equally attractive is that he married is hometown sweetheart and true Jersey girl.

 

 

Harry Connick, Jr. This multi-talented guy could also be with the movie stars (“Hope Floats” will always be one of my favorite movies ever and how lovable was he in it?) or TV stars (“Will and Grace” anyone?) but music is where he started so music is where he’ll be. The kind of guy you’d take home to mom and mom would love him. As would grandma, Aunt Betty, and anyone else around.

 

 

TV

 

The men of “This Is Us.” All of them. Chris Sullivan as Toby. Vilo Ventimiglia as Jack. Sterling K. Brown as Randall. Justin Hartley as Kevin. Couldn’t find a photo of all four so separate props to my man Toby who is so lovable and patient with Kate. His “I’d marry the hell out of you” line was brilliant.

 

 

Seth Meyers. I know, weird right? Call him my quirky crush. Something about him I find so charming though. Call me crazy.

 

 

Tucker Carlson. Call me crazy on this one too, but his smiling eyes are oh so charming. So is his laugh and his brain.

 

 

Jason Lewis. Who, you ask? One word: Smith. From “Sex and the City.” You’re welcome.

 

 

And speaking of SATC, who didn’t love Mr. Big (except for that one lapse of judgment in the limo)?

 

 

Joshua Morrow. Otherwise known as Nick on “The Young and the Restless,” Morrow has been on my crush list for years. And he has an OU tattoo!

 

 

Shep from “Southern Charm.” The ultimate tool, over-aged frat boy, and forever bachelor, Shep still has something so endearing about him. Someday he’ll grow up. Someday.

 

 

Jonathan Jackson. Avery on “Nashville,” Jackson is the quiet sexy type on the show who is forever forgiving and patient with Juliette. Love him.

 

 

Dan Abrams. I’ve always thought this network news reporter had more than a brain. Tell me the news Dan; tell me the news.

 

 

Mark Consuelos. Is he not the cutest ever? Kelly is one lucky lady.

 

 

 

Politics

 

Marco Rubio. The political pickings are slim, but I find the Senator from Florida so endearing. I also have a crush on his politics. He’ll forever be my candidate and have my vote.

 

So there you have it. Clearly I’m not the “classically handsome” kinda girl. Do you agree with any of them? Totally disagree with any of my picks? Did I miss anyone? Who are your picks for MCM?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you drive to work, sit at work, then go home and sit at your computer or in front of the TV, listen up.

 

And, even if you do all of the above but squeeze in exercise, still listen up. And stand up.

 

Why? Because 10 years’ worth of studies show that sitting is really, really bad for us. It gives us back problems, leads to obesity, increases the risk of heart disease, results in diabetes because idle muscles encourage the pancreas to produce more insulin, and it increases the amount of fluid that accumulates in our legs leading to everything from swollen ankles to varicose veins to dangerous blood clots. Medical experts also attribute the recent increase of osteoporosis to the lack of activity and the constant craning of your neck in front of a computer strains the cervical vertebrae and can lead to permanent imbalances. If all of that isn’t bad enough, there’s “sedentary death syndrome,” defined as death caused by extreme inactivity and poor nutrition.

 

Do I have your attention yet?

 

If you don’t believe me, listen to Tom Rath, author of “Eat, Move, Sleep.” After exhaustive research on the subject, he concluded that inactivity is so dangerous that sitting more than six hours a day will greatly increase your risk of an early death. Perhaps most shocking is that inactivity now kills more people than smoking, making it what many are calling “the new smoking” and the most underrated health-threat of our time.

 

So there’s that.

 

Think about it. Most of us go from our bed to our car to our office or school and then back to our car before calling it a night as we watch TV in our chair. Oh, we might also take some time to get on our computers…all while sitting in a chair. That is a whole lot of sitting!

 

Cue the researchers who find many of us are either lying down or sitting 20 hours per day, leaving a measly four hours for activity. We are literally living with a stalled metabolic rate that is similar to an anesthetized patient for more than 80 percent of our day.

 

Studying our inactivity is part of the fast-growing field called “inactivity physiology.” Google it and you’ll see lots comes up. Basically defined as the study of how lifestyle causes disease and that too much sitting has very potent effects on the body contributing to the most common diseases, inactive physiology was pioneered by Marc Hamilton who stresses that “too little exercise” is not the same as “too much sitting.” His studies have found that physical inactivity can impair basic but key body functions that regulate our fat and cholesterol metabolism and that this isn’t reversed by exercise. Even to all of you who work out daily, prolonged sitting can still increase your long-term risk of illness and even death.

 

So, what can we do? In short, stand up!

 

Research shows that standing for at least two hours a day can lower cholesterol as well as the sugar and fat levels in your blood. Your goal should be to stand as many hours a day as you sit.

 

Corporate America is listening and two trends have emerged: treadmill desks and standing desks. You’ve probably seen them in movies and at your own place of work and they are working.

 

 

Also called walk stations, treadmill desks are basically just that: treadmills attached to or in front of desks. Instead of sitting in a chair while working, you’re moving at an average speed of 1-2 mph, which is fast enough to get your heart rate up, double your metabolic rate, and improve blood sugar levels but slow enough so you can type, read, and talk on the phone comfortably. They are proving great ways to get physical activity in while doing your job.

 

Standing desks are also gaining popularity. Instead of sitting in front of your desk you stand, meaning your leg muscles are constantly engaged, which helps improve the bloodstream while eliminating lower back and neck pain. These are proving even better for you than all those expensive ergonomically correct desk chairs that were once all the rage.

 

If you must sit at your desk, consider doing so on a giant exercise ball. Yep, the big inflatable and fun balls will help improve your posture, keep you somewhat moving and not static because you have to balance on them, and they also strengthen your core, your legs, and your back muscles. Balls are also being experimented with in schools too with desk chairs being replaced by them.

 

It’s all about productivity and health costs at the corporate level and it’s really pretty simple. Healthy employees are more productive and cost the bottom line less in insurance and health care costs. Oh to have invested in treadmill desk manufacturers, as sales have dramatically increased thanks to companies like Microsoft, Procter & Gamble, Coca-Cola, United Health Care, the Mayo Clinic, and even the FBI buying walk stations in bulk.

 

Employees are happy too. Most love knowing they are getting in some physical activity while in the office and credit their new office furniture with helping them think more clearly and feel more productive.

 

If there is no getting around sitting at a desk or anywhere for extended periods of time, at the very least take regular breaks to stretch and walk around. Do a “walk and talk” phone call or just walk the stairs every now and then.

 

So all you couch potatoes out there, it’s time you get up, stand up, and move around. Don’t take a seat, take a stand!