Happy Halloween everyone! I say that somewhat hesitantly, not because I don’t hope you have a safe and happy Halloween, but because I am not a big fan of Halloween…at all. I will say it’s fun to see all the cute costumes the kids at my preschool job wear, but that’s about where the fun ends for me.
First of all, I don’t like costumes and every year I dread coming up with something creative and clever for parties and work. I also hate the fact that, for some mysterious reason, Halloween is the day so many otherwise respectable and almost always middle-aged women choose to dress sexy, slutty, or both. Ladies, please, enough with the cleavage, short skirts, and fishnets. If they don’t look good on you any other day of the year, they don’t look good on you on Halloween either!
Secondly, I don’t like anything scary or creepy. I hate bugs, I don’t ever see scary movies or read scary books, and you will never, ever find me on a roller coaster. I truly believe my heart would just stop beating if I ever had to ride a scary one or any scary ride for that matter. Spin? I love it! I can do it all day and love any Tilt-a-Whirl and Dumbo and the Tea Cups at Disney World, but I am scared to death of going upside down. Scary is not a way I ever want to feel, even by choice.
I don’t even remember loving Halloween as a child. I can just picture those old-fashioned simple costumes with a tunic-like top and a plastic mask (my favorite was Caspar the Friendly Ghost) but other than that, the holiday simply fades into a memory bank of mine I no longer visit.
Once I had Kristen, things really didn’t change. Oh I’d take her out Trick-or-Treating and buy costumes of her choice, but it was never an evening I looked forward to. I don’t know what I dislike more, walking around ringing neighbors’ doorbells asking for unhealthy treats or manning the door at our house and doling out candy. Once the teenagers start coming around, it’s lights on my porch!
Yes, I guess I’m the Halloween Scrooge. The Great Pumpkin Pooper. I love fall and Harvest-themed decorations but you can keep all the ghouly and gorey things. It has nothing to do with my religious beliefs either. I don’t consider Halloween a sacrilegious or pagan celebration; I just don’t get into it all.
Still, I hope everyone who loves today has fun and stays safe. As for me, I’ll be waiting for you with a bowl of candy but the night will be no treat for me. Boo!