Beyond Words

Words, Wit and Wisdom for Today's Style and Decision Makers

Through Your Looking Glass April 16, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 9:57 pm




“It’s not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life, it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power,” Robert T. Kiyosaki


Have you seen the new Dove soap campaign titled “You are more beautiful than you think?”  It is equally amazing and disturbing.   In the experiment aimed at changing the way you see yourself, a composite artist – like the kind who sits in court rooms – is hired.  Hidden behind a screen, he asks a woman to describe herself to him and he draws according to what she says.  Then, another woman – one who just recently met the previously drawn woman – is asked by that same artist to describe her new friend to him.  When the two drawings are compared side-by-side, it’s shocking how much prettier and flattering the friend describes the subject than the subject describes herself.   (check it out at


It’s a common problem, especially among women, and I’m the first to admit I’m as guilty as anyone.  If asked to describe my face to a sketch artist, I’d probably start with my crooked teeth and my thin eyebrows.  People have been known, and I shudder to even write this, to comment on my “good skin” and high cheekbones, but if I mentioned them at all, they would come way later.  Why is this about women? 


I will also admit that sweet Kathi T. at Chico’s in Norman last week made my day.  She was so friendly and complimentary in a genuine and congenial way that I purchased more than I normally would have and felt good about myself while trying on clothes.  She wasn’t phony or pushy.  Instead, she was simply kind and courteous.  Everyone needs this.  I needed it.   I left there feeling like she could be my new best friend.


“No one ever told me I was pretty when I was a little girl.

All little girls should be told they’re pretty, even if they aren’t.”  

Marilyn Monroe



I think my daughter Kristen is beautiful and everyone says she looks just like me but I certainly don’t think I’m beautiful.  How can that be?   Why are we so critical of ourselves?  Do fall into the troublesome trap of putting yourself down and only seeing what you consider your negatives?


Society as a whole certainly doesn’t help.  Plastic surgery is now a multi-million dollar industry; an industry built on the idea that your God-given face or body is just not pretty or good enough. 




In that Dove ad, there’s a voice over quote saying “We spend a lot of time as women analyzing and trying to fix the things that aren’t quite right and should spend more time appreciating the things that we do like.”


Amen, and amen to Dove for reminding us to do so.


You are beautiful and it’s time to tell yourself that.







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