Fall is a mere week away but here at home we are currently in the midst of what many call “the dog days of summer.” That phrase however, often conjures up images of lazing around and enjoying some days off albeit in the summer heat. Its origin however, actually means something quite different.
“The dog days of summer” comes from ancient astronomy. Greeks and Romans noticed that the star Sirius, knows as the Dog Star, rose alongside the sun during the hottest weeks of the summer. It doesn’t end there though. They believed that Sirius intensified the sun’s heat, bringing drought, fever, and bad luck and blamed the star for a host of seasonal ailments and misfortunes. Yikes! It all kinda makes sense then, that many years later the term became shorthand for the sweltering summer heat when soaring temperatures can make even simple daily tasks feel exhausting.
I can relate.
When I look at our weather forecast it’s a string of 100+ degree days.
Double yikes.
I realize some of you may be experiencing fall-like temps, but not here.
It’s all enough to make you want to do nothing.
Come to find out, that’s not always a bad thing.
There is truly an art to doing nothing and how to chill out without feeling guilty.
My husband and I had a pretty busy weekend in comparison to those we normally have. Both our football teams had big games. We went to a concert downtown. I had a book signing and he had a golf tournament. It was all fun and games (except one of the games!) but it’s also enough to make me say “no mas” today.
He and I were actually chatting about it all this morning. I’m a planner and I’m a scheduler. My calendar regularly has many entries, albeit mostly things I enjoy: golf, bible study, rosary group, workout classes, and the likes. In between I fit in getting together with friends, doctors’ appointments, and fun activities. I also however, must have “do nothing” days as I’m an introvert and I’m a homebody. I am never bored in my house and I relish being home. If a week is filling up, I keep one day commitment-free and do as I like. The key come to find out, is finding balance without overcommitting. It works for me but isn’t something society pushes.
Sadly, anxiety about “wasting” a day doing nothing is more and more common and actually has a term mental health experts use: Leisure Guilt. As brilliant and blessed Holley Gerth writes, we’re often led to believe that the ordinary can seem so small and that work done quietly and kindness offered without applause are not encouraged. The world, she says, often tells us that making a difference means doing something big. But we’re fast learning that busy and big aren’t always better and worth and meaning aren’t determined by productivity and attention.
RealSimple recently did a lengthy article on this and I found it fascinating. Not because I’m guilty of it, but because it’s somewhat validated my life. Come to find out society’s hustle culture might be productive but not always healthy.
It all starts in childhood where achievement is praised but simply trying and existing is often overlooked. Social media definitely fosters all of this as it conveys the illusion that everyone else is launching a start-up or training for their next marathon. The adult version of achievement praise manifests itself as a person who can’t relax without feeling guilty and bragging about how busy we are.
As Fr. David P. Uribe recently wrote, something in us has become dissatisfied with the ordinary. We’ve come to believe that the predictable routines and the ordinary are vilified. And yet, living sane, normal lives has been proven to be safe, steady, and secure. Simple happiness is having a renaissance and the rhythm of the ordinary is proving to be the deepest wellspring from which to draw joy and meaning.
It should come as no surprise that when we regain our health and energy after being ill, off work, and out of our normal routines and rhythms, nothing is as sweet as returning to normal, everyday life. Think about returning from a trip. I don’t know about you, but regardless of how fun and fabulous a trip was, I’m always grateful to be back home.
Anxiety and OCD therapist Joanna Hardis confirms this as does her book “Just Do Nothing.” In it we learn that people tend to think staying busy will reduce feelings like anxiety but it often does just the opposite. It’s often actually downtime that the body and brain are craving and needing as rest is when the nervous system gets to do its repair work. Therapist Margaret Sigel goes on to say that research suggests creativity is born not from grinding harder but from the loose, unfocused state the brain enters when it isn’t stressed or being directed. It’s vital to let our minds rest and wander.
How difficult is that for you to do? Even me, they happy homebody finds it difficult to be still as yes, I may be a nester but I’m also an overthinker. As I’m thinking about my to-do list, I need to remember to save time for unstructured nothing without an agenda. Ideally without devices. Tough, right? But, the on-demand and instant info and connection our handheld devices offer may keep us connected, but they also contribute to our unease when it comes to leisure time.
All experts say it’s important to remind yourself that sitting still isn’t lazy; it’s important self-care. Taking time to slow down actually recharges us and provides us with the energy needed for work, parenting, and relationships.
What I find helpful is to do a little something while I’m watching TV so even though I am sitting, I’m still accomplishing something. I like to cross-stitch, browse through magazines, and even clean up photos on my phone. Experts agree that intentionally scheduling nothing to do on our calendars leaves room for things like knitting, jigsaw puzzles, reading, ceramics, and painting, which are all healthy and what are called analog hobbies: activities that don’t involve screens. These types of activities can help you think differently than you’re maybe used to, as we’re left-brain users when working on any computer but these activities engage the right side of the brain. And think about it, if you’re someone who’s been on your feet all day, these activities are a perfect match for you.
One book that I’m thinking about putting on my list that supports this whole thought process is Annie B. Jones’ “Ordinary Time: Lessons Learned While Staying Put.” In the story of her own life, Jones challenges the idea that loud lives are the ones that matter most and instead encourages celebrating and honoring our ordinary lives. There’s much to be said about being a contented, ordinary person anchored in the rhythms and the steady of the ordinary and finding joy in the simplest of things. Add to cart…
In another book, “The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” by Pastor John Mark Comer we’re reminded that even God rested after six long days of hard work. We’re invited to turn our modern addiction to hurry and hustle on its head by picking one day, preferably the Sabbath, to rest. Did you know that the word Sabbath comes to us from the Hebrew word “Shabbat,” which literally means to stop? It can also be translated to “delight.” Ask yourself “what could I do for 24 hours that would fill me with true joy and delight?” It might be reading a book. It might be taking a walk. It might be calling an old friend. It might be doing nothing.
So, maybe this week practice and find ways to reclaim stillness amid life’s chaos. Maybe don’t focus on changing the world but instead making one small but meaningful change in your life or the life of someone else. In a world begging us to speed up, be bold enough to slow down. Slow down and stop. Stop and smell the roses.
Beyond Words 