Beyond Words

Words, Wit and Wisdom for Today's Style and Decision Makers

Sunday Scripture: A Godly Week September 15, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 7:27 pm

23643966763778013_XcMOCo7f_b

 

I’m trying to have a nice, relaxing Sunday of reading the Sunday paper and watching football, but apparently I should instead be at the grocery store buying “much needed” soy sauce and catching up on laundry.  That, according to my husband oh so subtly.  Granted, our hamper was over-flowing so loading up the washer has commenced, but no way am I going to HEB on a busy and crowded Sunday when I can go tomorrow instead.  I’m pretty sure the soy sauce can wait so here I sit, watching football and writing my blog.

 

I thought I knew what I was going to write about today, but while browsing through my “Blog Ideas” file I ran across something else that spoke to me.  Actually, it screamed at me.

 

It didn’t have a title on the notes I have, so I’m calling it “A Godly Week.”  It goes like this:

 

Monday – “Wash Day”

“Lord, help me wash away my selfishness and vanity so I may serve you with perfect humility through the week ahead.”

 

Tuesday – “Ironing Day”

“Lord, help me iron out all the wrinkles of prejudice I have collected through the years so that I may see the beauty in others.”

 

Wednesday – “Mending Day”

“Lord, help me mend my ways so I will not set a bad example for others.”

 

Thursday – “Cleaning Day”

“Lord, help me dust out all of the many faults and bad habits I have been hiding in the secret corners of my mind and my heart.”

 

Friday – “Shopping Day”

“Lord, give me the grace to live and shop wisely so I may purchase eternal happiness.”

 

Saturday – “Cooking Day”

“Lord, help me brew a big kettle of brotherly love and serve it with the sweetness of human kindness.”

 

Sunday – “The Lord’s Day”

“Lord, I have prepared my house for you.  Please come into my heart so I may spend the day with you.”

 

So, there you have it.  Maybe I should be more grateful.  Grateful that I have a husband to annoy me about “to do’s,” grateful that I have clothes to wash and a washer and dryer to do them in, grateful that I can afford to go to the grocery store, and grateful that that very store has more food in it then I’ll ever need.

 

All this reminds me of this, my friend Janel’s recent Facebook post:

Janel's

Thank you Janel for reminding me and thank you God for blessing me, way more than I deserve.

 

 

Tuesday’s Tip September 10, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 10:51 pm

 

318789_10151906349085321_260438954_n

 

“The foundation you build in your 20s will define the rest of your life.  Take yourself seriously.”  

Meg Jay, psychologist and author of The Defining Decade:  Why Your 20s Matter and How To Make the Most of Them

 

I have a 20-year-old daughter so the following article I recently ran across in Forbes really hit home.  It’s really, really good advice for all of us.

 

As with most parents, I want my daughter to have it better than I did.   Within limits and devoid of extremes.   I also want her to have to work for things.  She’s working hard right now in college, is getting good grades and has an impressive internship with the OU Athletic Department.  Sometimes though, we need to rein her in.

 

Take for example her apartment and living situation this year…her first year to not live in a dorm or sorority house.  It’s a very nice and safe apartment with great facilities that include a workout center, a computer lab, a swimming pool and a (ugh!) tanning room.  She’s quickly learning, however, how expensive her favorite salmon dinner entrees are and that having someone cook for you in a cafeteria or dining room is pretty darn nice.  She’s learning more this year than ever that budgets are not always easy to stay within.  She also recently started to lament about the fact that her apartment does not have stainless steel appliances and granite counters like those of many of her friends.  STOP RIGHT THERE MISSY!!!!  As I’ve written before, as much as we try to raise them right, young adults today expect it all.

 

So, when I saw this Forbes article I forwarded it right to Kristen.  Whether she read it or not, I don’t know.  Today, in deciding what to blog for my “Tuesday Tip,” I thought you, my glorious readers, might have someone you need to forward it too as well.  Or, if you’re in the “twenty something” age group, simply read on!

 

 

 “20 Things 20-Year-Olds Don’t Get”

Jason Nazar, Forbes magazine

 

I started Docstoc in my 20s; made the cover of one of those cliché “20 under 20” lists, and today I employ an amazing group of 20-somethings.  Call me a curmudgeon, but at 34, how I came up seems so different from what this millennial generation expects.  I made a lot of mistakes along the way, and I see this generation making their own.  In response, here are my “20 Things 20-Year-Olds Don’t Get.”

 

Time is Not a Limitless Commodity – I so rarely find young professionals that have a heightened sense of urgency to get to the next level.  In our 20s we think we have all the time in the world to A) figure it out and B) get what we want.  Time is the only treasure we start off with in abundance, and can never get back.  Make the most of the opportunities you have today, because there will be a time when you have no more of it.

 

You’re Talented, But Talent is Overrated – Congratulations, you may be the most capable, creative, knowledgeable & multi-tasking generation yet.  As my father says, “I’ll Give You a Sh-t Medal.”  Unrefined raw materials (no matter how valuable) are simply wasted potential.  There’s no prize for talent, just results.  Even the most seemingly gifted folks methodically and painfully worked their way to success.

 

We’re More Productive in the Morning – During my first 2 years at Docstoc, I prided myself on staying at the office until 3 a.m. on a regular basis.  I thought I got so much work done in those hours long after everyone else was gone.  But in retrospect I got more menial, task-based items done, not the more complicated strategic planning, phone calls or meetings that needed to happen during business hours.  Now I stress an office-wide early start time because I know, for the most part, we’re more productive as a team in those early hours of the day.

 

Social Media is Not a Career – These job titles won’t exist in 5 years. Social media is simply a function of marketing; it helps support branding, ROI or both.  Social media is a means to get more awareness, more users or more revenue.  It’s not an end in itself.  I’d strongly caution against pegging your career trajectory solely to a social media job title.

 

Pick Up the Phone – Stop hiding behind your computer. Business gets done on the phone and in person.  It should be your first instinct, not last, to talk to a real person and source business opportunities.  And when the Internet goes down… stop looking so befuddled and don’t ask to go home.  Don’t be a pansy, pick up the phone.

 

Be the First In & Last to Leave ­– I give this advice to everyone starting a new job or still in the formative stages of their professional career.  You have more ground to make up than everyone else around you and you do have something to prove.  There’s only one sure-fire way to get ahead, and that’s to work harder than all of your peers.

 

Don’t Wait to Be Told What to Do – You can’t have a sense of entitlement without a sense of responsibility.  You’ll never get ahead by waiting for someone to tell you what to do.  Saying “nobody asked me to do this” is a guaranteed recipe for failure.  Err on the side of doing too much, not too little.

 

Take Responsibility for Your Mistakes – You should be making lots of mistakes early on in your career but you shouldn’t be defensive about errors in judgment or execution.  Stop trying to justify your F-ups.  You’re only going to grow by embracing the lessons learned from your mistakes and committing to learn from those experiences.

 

You Should Be Getting Your Butt Kicked – Meryl Streep in “The Devil Wears Prada” would be the most valuable boss you could possibly have.  This is the most impressionable, malleable and formative stage of your professional career.  Working for someone that demands excellence and pushes your limits every day will build the most solid foundation for your ongoing professional success.

 

A New Job a Year Isn’t a Good Thing ­­– 1-year stints don’t tell me you’re so talented that you keep outgrowing your company.  It tells me that you don’t have the discipline to see your own learning curve through to completion.  It takes about 2-3 years to master any new critical skill; give yourself at least that much time before you jump ship.  Otherwise, your resume reads as a series of red flags on why not to be hired.

 

People Matter More Than Perks – It’s so trendy to pick the company that offers the most flex time, unlimited meals, company massages, game rooms and team outings.  Those should all matter, but not as much as the character of your founders and managers. Great leaders will mentor you and will be a loyal source of employment long after you’ve left.  Make a conscious bet on the folks you’re going to work for and your commitment to them will pay off much more than those fluffy perks.

 

Map Effort to Your Professional Gain – You’re going to be asked to do things you don’t like to do.  Keep your eye on the prize.   Connect what you’re doing today with where you want to be tomorrow.  That should be all the incentive you need.  If you can’t map your future success to your current responsibilities, then it’s time to find a new opportunity.

 

Speak Up, Not Out – We’re raising a generation of sh-t talkers.  In your workplace this is a cancer.  If you have issues with management, culture or your role & responsibilities, SPEAK UP.  Don’t take those complaints and trash-talk the company or co-workers on lunch breaks and anonymous chat boards.  If you can effectively communicate what needs to be improved,  you have the ability to shape your surroundings and professional destiny.

 

You HAVE to Build Your Technical Chops – Adding “Proficient in Microsoft Office” at the bottom of your resume is not going to cut it anymore.  I immediately give preference to candidates who are ninjas in: Photoshop, HTML/CSS, iOS, WordPress, Adwords, MySQL, Balsamiq, advanced Excel, Final Cut Pro – regardless of their job position.  If you plan to stay gainfully employed, you better complement that humanities degree with some applicable technical chops.

 

Both the Size and Quality of Your Network Matter – It’s who you know more than what you know that gets you ahead in business.  Knowing a small group of folks very well or a huge smattering of contacts superficially just won’t cut it.  Meet and stay connected to lots of folks and invest your time developing as many of those relationships as possible.

 

You Need At Least 3 Professional Mentors – The most guaranteed path to success is to emulate those who’ve achieved what you seek.  You should always have at least 3 people you call mentors who are where you want to be.  Their free guidance and counsel will be the most priceless gift you can receive.

 

Pick an Idol & Act “As If” – You may not know what to do, but your professional idol does.  I often coach my employees to pick the businessperson they most admire and act “as if.”  If you were (fill in the blank) how would he or she carry themself, make decisions, organize his/her day, and accomplish goals?  You’ve got to fake it until you make it, so it’s better to fake it as the most accomplished person you could imagine. (Shout out to Tony Robbins for the tip.)

 

Read More Books, Fewer Tweets/Texts – Your generation consumes information in headlines and 140 characters:  all breadth and no depth.  Creativity, thoughtfulness and thinking skills are freed when you’re forced to read a full book cover to cover.  All the keys to your future success lay in the past experience of others.  Make sure to read a book a month (fiction or non-fiction) and your career will blossom.

 

Spend 25% Less Than You Make – When your material needs meet or exceed your income, you’re sabotaging your ability to really make it big.  Don’t shackle yourself with golden handcuffs (a fancy car or an expensive apartment).  Be willing and able to take 20% less in the short term if it could mean 200% more earning potential.  You’re nothing more than penny-wise and pound-foolish if you pass up an amazing new career opportunity to keep an extra little bit of income.  No matter how much money you make, spend 25% less to support your life.  It’s a guaranteed formula to be less stressed and to always have the flexibility to pursue your dreams.

 

Your Reputation is Priceless, Don’t Damage It – Over time, your reputation is the most valuable currency you have in business.  It’s the invisible key that either opens or closes doors of professional opportunity.  Especially in an age where everything is forever recorded and accessible, your reputation has to be guarded like the most sacred treasure.  It’s the one item that once lost, you can never get back.

 

 

 

 

More Than Just Pretty September 9, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 8:39 pm

Bracelets displayed

 

 

Several years ago while visiting OU with Kristen before she was a student there; I noticed my friend Ann was wearing the prettiest bracelets. She told me they could be found at a small boutique in Norman and that they were made by women in Nepal. I fell in love with them and have been collecting them ever since.

 

Fast forward four years and the bracelets are everywhere! They have taken the fashion industry by storm and match easily with any outfit or any style. It’s not every day Oklahoma sets a fashion trend, but in this case I’m giving credit where credit is due. (In a reversal of fortunes however, I have to say Kristen was wearing Kendra Scott jewelry at OU years ago and today a pair of Scott’s signature “Danielle” earrings is a virtual unofficial emblem of an OU girl and are everywhere in the Sooner state!) Back to the bracelets. Every time I wear them, people ask me about them so I figured it was time to blog about them.

 

They are called “Lily and Laura” bracelets and the story behind them is as beautiful as the bracelets themselves.

 

Laura has always loved to travel, and after earning an art history degree she moved to Nepal. While living there, she discovered the Nepali crocheted bracelets and decided to devote her energy to helping her new friends make them and sell them to support themselves.

 

Bracelets makers

 

“Each bracelet is a little piece of artwork,” says Laura. “Our women artists are passionate about making the bracelets they crochet very special.”

 

The bracelets aren’t cheap (most boutiques charge around $30 for three) but only the finest glass beads are used in them and each and every bracelet is hand crocheted by Nepali women, bead by bead and in the comfort of their own homes. No two bracelets are alike and they comfortably roll on over any size hand. Best of all, they are produced using a “fair trade” wage structure, allowing the artisans to improve the quality of their lives while providing a Nepal custom the world over. The women are seen as artisans in their communities and are able to help support their families and break the cycle of poverty, abuse, and human trafficking in the region.

 

Most people wear them in “stacks” and blend a color scheme in doing so. You can wear several of them together, combine them with other bracelets, or perhaps even with a stylish watch. Here are a few samples of some of mine:

 

Bracelets

 

The next time you see a bowl full of beaded bracelets in a store, which is usually how they’re displayed, consider buying a few. I promise you’ll grow to love them and the women who made them for you will love the life you are helping provide them.

 

Sunday Scripture September 8, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 2:43 pm

Keeping it simple today…

21ee4d62afc028cc196c691cf7e81e9e

 

 

 

Travel…In Your Own Backyard September 7, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 2:53 pm

Travel

No one puts “websites I want to visit” on their Bucket List.

 

It’s amazing what you can learn about the city you live in by taking a tour of it.  Last night I thoroughly enjoyed a “bat boat” cruise along Town Lake…er Lake Lady Bird…with the Austin Women Travelers group and learned a lot too!

 

Those of you unfamiliar with Austin may be asking, “bat boat, what the heck is that?”  Well, let me tell you!  Austin, the city proud of “keeping it weird,” is home to the world’s largest urban bat colony.  Under our beloved Congress Street Bridge lives 1.5 million Mexican free tail bats.  Yes, MILLIONS!  Between March and November, every night at dusk they descend out of crevices underneath the bridge en masse.  They’re all female and they’re essentially going out for dinner.  They always fly away from the setting sun and are so lightweight even the slightest wind can push them.  On a really still evening, they look like a giant black cloud.  People line the bridge, nearby restaurant balconies, grassy knolls along the lake, and several commercial boats, which is what we did.  It may sound crazy but it’s actually quite impressive to watch more than a million bats fly into the sky at one time.   We love our bats in Austin.  We have a bat statue not far from the bridge and we love that they eat thousands of pounds of bugs every night.  Mosquitos?  Austin doesn’t have half the problem other cities near water do, thanks to our bats!

 

photo (27) photo (16) photo (14)

 

I’ve lived in Austin 27 years but this was only the third or fourth time I’ve done the bats.  We had a great tour operator on the boat who informed us that the Frost Bank tower looks like an owl, City Hall is supposedly built to look like an armadillo (I didn’t see it; perhaps he was pulling one on us), and that the city’s tallest building, The Austonian, is jokingly referred to as the world’s largest USB drive.  It does!  And how appropriate for our city, the centre of the Silicon Hills?!  The skyline of Austin changes almost daily, so it was also nice to learn the names of all those building and what they house.  Amazingly, the majority of all new buildings aren’t office space, but condos.  Glorious condos.  Have I mentioned shut the gates yet?!

 

photo (53)

The “owl” and the “USB port”

 

I remember taking a tour of my hometown Santa Fe on board the city’s “Chile Line” bus.  It was so informative and fun!  I also remember taking the trolley car tour in San Francisco and opting for the double-decker bus tour of London the day we arrived because it was pouring rain.  We learned so much and saw the whole city in one fell swoop.  These types of tours then allow you to later pick and choose which sites you want to go back to.

 

They say travel is really the only thing you spend money on that makes you richer.  And even though travel can also be so frustrating, I couldn’t agree more.  Even if it’s right in your backyard.

 

Friday Funny September 6, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 9:37 pm

fdffcbf06804e120479983a86031a5b6

Happy Friday everyone!

 

Where There Is Doubt, Faith September 1, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 8:18 pm

A simple judge of character is how you treat a person who can do absolutely nothing for you.

 Humility

 

You may or may not have noticed, but I haven’t been very motivated to write my blog lately.  It’s been a crazy time getting Kristen back to college and getting ready for the start of my school year.   I’ve thought about some good topics but I just haven’t followed through on sharing them with you.  Leave it to God to get me going again.

 

Just yesterday Smitty asked me if I had ever read the “Peace Prayer of St. Francis.”  I told him it’s always been one of my favorites, hangs next to my bed and on my desk, was sung at our wedding and at Princess Di’s funeral, and that the statues in our backyard are St. Francis.   We talked a little about it all and went about our day.

 

This morning we go to mass and what’s one of the songs being sung?  Yep, the Peace Prayer.  Not only that, but the entire homily was about humility, which St. Francis was known for; Pope Francis, who took his name in honor of the saint and who is also known for his humble actions; and even Johnny Manziel who we were told didn’t demonstrate God’s humility during yesterday’s A&M game.  It all literally gave me chills and brought me to my knees.

 

Finding Peace

The first part of the “Prayer of St. Francis” reminds us what we should strive to be while the second part reminds us what not to be.  In short, Father God help me to sow, or give, faith, hope, forgiveness and love to others and not focus so much on my own struggles and injuries.  The secret is doing all of this, we were told in mass, is not just to talk the talk, but to walk the walk.  As St. Francis himself is quoted as saying, “Preach the Gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words.”  Do your actions always sow love?  Do mine?  Lord, please help make me a channel of your peace.

 

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

 

 

Humility

 

Being Humble

Today’s readings were also inspiring.  We were reminded that we are all “poor” in some way and that only through humility do we achieve true heavenly strength.  It’s always important to remember that even rich men need God and scripture encourages us to think of others first and to invite the poor to our tables.  This, as we all know, is not always easy.  Try as we may, we often fail.

 

In the book of Sirach we are told:  My child, conduct your affairs with humility, and you will be loved more than a giver of gifts. Humble yourself the more, the greater you are, and you will find favor with God. What is too sublime for you, seek not, into things beyond your strength search not.

 

And Micah 6:8 teaches us:  You have been told what is good and what the Lord requires of you:  Only to do justice and to love goodness and to walk humbly with your God.

 

As we humbly walked to our car, I noticed a lady carrying a dog.  Smitty and I both thought, “who brings a dog to church?”  Then it dawned on me, no one would be happier to see that then St. Francis, the lover of animals.

 

How can one not believe in God and that He is working miracles every day after experiencing all of this?  Not me, and hopefully not you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

So Annoying! August 17, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 4:39 pm

I’ve always thought a fun drinking game would be taking a sip every time someone on “Keeping up with the Kardashians” (yes, I’ve been known to watch the show with Kristen!) says something or someone is “so annoying.”  You see, I find it very annoying they say it constantly.  You could say it’s a pet peeve of mine.

 

Pet peeve1

 

I recently saw the above and died laughing and it got me thinking about pet peeves.  We all have them and here is a sampling of mine:

  • Disorganization
  • People talking on cell phones in public places
  • Those round stickers runners put on their cars with how many miles they ran (should I put “hole in one” on mine if I ever make one?!)
  • Older, mature women dressing like teenagers
  • Those AT&T commercials with the man asking kids questions…soooo annoying!
  • Starbucks drink sizes names.  (why isn’t “grande” the biggest and what the heck is “venti?”)
  • Alarm clocks
  • People wearing sunglasses indoors or when being interviewed on TV
  • Short on-ramps on freeways
  • Solicitors at my front door
  • When the person at the front of the right lane at a red light isn’t turning right
  • Cabinets or drawers left open after someone gets something from them
  • That Norah Jones’ debut album beat Bruce Springsteen’s “The Rising” for album of the year after 9/11 at the Grammys
  • When celebs complain about being famous
  • That the IPhone 5 requires all new charges and IHomes than the IPhone 4
  • The fact that, regardless of anyone else’s score or his, Tiger Woods always gets the TV coverage
  • That our regular trash bin is green but the recycle one is blue.  Shouldn’t it have been the other way around?
  • Jennifer Aniston’s “no bra” look on nearly every episode of “Friends.”  (We get it…you’re sexy but enough already.)
  • I hate that the carts at Target always stick together and getting one is nearly impossible
  • Bad grammar (irregardless is not a word and “axe” does not mean “ask”)
  • Over-plucked eyebrows
  • Hand blowers in bathrooms instead of towels
  • The fact that eye appointments, glasses, and lenses are not considered standard on insurance coverage.
  • Masseuses who talk the whole time or who try to fix every ache and pain in one hour.  (Just rub!)
  • People who start every sentence with “I mean…”

 

And last, but certainly not least…

Pet peeve

 

Do you agree or disagree with any of my pet peeves?  What are some of yours?  Please share!

 

Think About it Thursday August 15, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 10:59 pm

ef20676680c24c46a3e183dd03864876Very powerful.

 

Sunday Scripture August 4, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — carlawordsmithblog @ 4:17 pm

 

 

994759_518997364832723_235544301_n

“Don’t seek the blessing, seek God and the blessing will come to you. Make pleasing God your highest priority.”

Joel Osteen