Beyond Words

I’m crazy, right? Much of the northeast, including New York City, is still digging out of the blizzard known as Nemo and another storm is on the way, but when it comes to fashion, New York is all about spring.

 

I just got back from a glorious annual girls trip with my college buddies, this year to New York City, and am happy to say we saw glimpses of the early stages of New York Fashion Week. Famous and fabulous designers from around the world were in the Big Apple to unveil their newest clothing lines during what many regard as the fashion shows to end all fashion shows. Much of what is shown is considered “Spring 2013” wear, which means it’s what you’ll see on the racks this spring.  And, as wild and crazy as they may appear on run ways, the clothes often shows up in stores across America in one form or another. They literally, set the trends.

 

One of the hottest designers right now is Rachel Zoe, stylist to the stars and the subject of the popular TV show “The Rachel Zoe Project.” I’ve followed her sense of style a bit in the past, but am now a huge fan.  The super tiny and very sweet Zoe roomed right down the hall from us in New York and we ran into her often.  We shared many an elevator with her and her family and found her nothing short of friendly and lovely.  It was enough to make me want to be her next fashion “project!”

 

No such luck, but you don’t need luck to spot what’s going to be hot this spring, including:

White:

Valentino

 

 

Bold colors and Monochromatic:

Gucci

 

 

 
Black Tie and Menswear:

Ralph Lauren

 

 

 

Bold Stripes:

Michael Kors

 

 

 

Sparkle and Shine:

Rachel Zoe

 

 

Prints:

Tory Burch

 

 

Shoe-wise, looks for these hot trends:
Aqua:

Joan & David

 

 

 

Block heels:

Kate Spade

 

 

Pop of Color:

Stuart Weitzman

 

 

 

Sliver wedges:

Sam Edelman

 

 

Bows and Frills:

Steve Madden

 

Colorful flats:

Ivanka Trump

 

 

Shine and Metallic:

Rebecca Minkoff

 

 

Pointy Toe/Bright Colors:

Manolo Blahnik

 

 

Sporty fun/Urban Athleticism:

Kate Spade

 

 

Yes, the calendar says it’s still officially winter, but Punxsutawney Phil predicted an early spring so it’s never too early to dream or to start, right?

 

Happy shopping everyone!

“It isn’t enough to love; we must prove it,” St. Therese of Lisieux

Today’s the day; the day men live in fear and women live in hope. Men worry they will forget it’s Valentine’s Day all together or not give her the “perfect” gift, women hope they not only remember, but remember in a big way. Women, the nurturers that we are, also love to give and every February 14 is the perfect excuse to go all out. But why does Valentine’s Day even exist, other than to make Hallmark, Godiva, and FTD happy?

 

It all goes back to a man whose name was actually Valentine. Valentine was a priest in the third century and was arrested by the Roman Emperor Claudius II for being a Christian. Valentine would not denounce his Christianity so he was thrown in jail. While in prison he fell in love with the jailer’s blind daughter Julia, who would bring him flowers and notes from the village children. Valentine would reply to these notes with letters of his own, which he would sign “From Your Valentine.” He was killed on February 14, 269 but his legend of love and kindness lives on.

 

Then there’s Cupid, that somewhat creepy little diapered baby with a bow and arrow.  According to Roman mythology, Cupid was the son of Venus, the goddess of love. Interestingly enough, the Latin word “cupido” means desire.

 

And what’s up with X’s and O’s? “Hugs and kisses,” or xoxo, is a term used for expressing love, affection or good friendship at the end of a written letter (or text or email or tweet) and dates back to the Middle Ages, when a Christian cross was drawn on documents to mean sincerity, faith, and honesty.  A kiss was then placed on the cross by the signer as a display of their sworn oath. Since many commoners couldn’t read or write, an ‘X’ was used as their signature and a kiss was then placed upon it to show their sincerity. The “O,” on the other hand, is of North American descent and no one really seems to know how it started. Perhaps it represents a kiss-shaped mouth or open, huggable arms.

 

Finally, why do we wear our wedding rings on our left “ring” finger? Because that finger is the only one that has a vein that connects to the heart.  How heart-warming is that?!

 

 

So what exactly is love? Is it the tragic attraction Romeo had for Juliet? Is it the devotion one has for their children? Love, we discover, is not only many a splendored thing, but many things.

 

The word love can be defined either as a noun, “an intense feeling of deep affection,” or as a verb, “a deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone.” But can’t you love some thing too? I love my husband, my daughter and my family and friends, but I also love gummy fish, lighthouses, shoes, cheese, wine, and dogs. To me, love is a total selflessness and devotion to someone or something; a passion, a commitment. You often adore something or someone you love, but in a healthy way. You would do anything for that person and you often put their needs and wants before your own. Love grows and changes though. The love of a recently married couple is different from that of one that’s been married for many years. Your love for your mom and dad is different than your love for your close and dear friends. But, it’s all love. It’s quite different than lust, however, but it’s still a very powerful feeling and is something we all earn for and crave.

 

According to Philosopher and Writer Julian Baggini, “love is not one thing. Love for parents, partners, children, country, neighbor, God and so on all have different qualities. Each has its variants – blind, one-sided, tragic, steadfast, fickle, reciprocated, misguided, and unconditional. At its best, however, all love is a kind a passionate commitment that we nurture and develop, even though it usually arrives in our lives unbidden. That’s why it is more than just a powerful feeling. Without the commitment, it is mere infatuation. Without the passion, it is mere dedication. Without nurturing, even the best can wither and die.”

 

Nurture those you love today and every day and remember, love is patient, love is kind. I love it!

 

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you!

One of today’s mass readings has always been a favorite of mine, 1 Corinthians 13, but I found it especially timely today. It was in our wedding and Smitty and I celebrate our 27th anniversary next week. I also had to memorize the entire verse to be initiated into my college sorority and this week I leave for my annual girls trip with my four favorite sorority sisters. Faith, hope and love…the greatest of these is love.

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” C.S. Lewis

Do you ever have dreams that stick with you? Do you ever dream the same thing again and again over a period of time? What do dreams really mean anyway?

I’m wondering these things because just this morning I was telling my friends Janel and Ana about my recurring Russian dream. Yep, comrades, Russian dream!

It all started because I asked them if either had seen the new TV series “The Americans” this past week. I was interested in the new show because its premise revolves around two Russian spies living in the U.S. as your basic, suburban mom and dad in the 1980s. The show was okay, didn’t love it but didn’t hate it, and it’s just one more example of the Russian in my life.

Now back to my dream. I’ve had a certain dream off and on for years now. The details in it vary here and there, but it’s almost always about me either trying to get to Russia and can’t or I’m trying to get out of Russia and can’t. Every now and then Florida is involved. I know, crazy right?

I’ve never been to Russia and have no Russian ancestry but I have always been interested in its history. In college I was forever taking “The History Of” or “The Politics of” Russia electives. And, I would love to visit Moscow.

So that’s my dream, but my Russian connection doesn’t end there. Just recently when we were in Key West over Christmas, we took a pedi-cab and when I asked our driver where he was from he said Russia! On my annual college girls trip last year I tried on a coat and as I asked the girls if they liked it, the store owner said he has a client from Russia who bought the coat in several colors! And, a month or so ago I was driving into our neighborhood and was behind a new model Volvo. I thought to myself, “I like the new style” and then noticed a “RUS” sticker on the back!

My friends and family joke that I must have been a pre-Russian Revolution princess in my previous life. Sounds good to me but could I also maybe be either a gold medal ice skater, gymnast or Maria Sharapova-like tennis champion?! I think I’d like my name to Nastasha.

This all reminds me of one of my favorite lines in the movie “Bull Durham.” Susan Sarandon is going on and on about being someone glamorous in her former life and Kevin Costner asks “why isn’t anyone ever Joe Schmoe in their previous life?” Good question, and quite funny too!

So what could my dream really mean? Do dreams really mean anything? In his book “The Interpretation of Dreams,” the legendary Sigmund Freud said the content of dreams is related to wish fulfillment. Martin Luther King, Jr. somewhat single-handedly rewrote history just by having a dream. You dream it, you can live it sometimes.
Still, according to the psychology section of About.com, “Dreams can be mysterious, but understanding the meaning of our dreams can be downright baffling. The fact that dreams can be so rich and compelling is what causes many to believe that there must be some meaning to our dreams. While many theories exist to explain why we dream, no one yet fully understands their purpose, let alone how to interpret the meaning of dreams. In fact, some prominent researchers such as G. William Domhoff suggest that dreams most likely serve no real purpose.”

So maybe dreams don’t indicate anything life-changing or earth-shattering and maybe I wasn’t a Russian princess, but as Walt Disney once said, “If you can dream it, you can do it. Always remember that this whole thing was started with a dream and a mouse.” Maybe my mouse just happens to speak Russian. Dream on friends, dream on. Spasibo!

In honor of flu season…

Have you ever wondered why there are four gospels in the Bible? Did you even know there are four separate gospels?! Today during mass Father Izzy talked about this and it was very enlightening. Instead of my normal “Sunday Scripture” quote, I thought I’d share some of his wisdom with you.

He started by saying someone once asked him why, if the story is the same, are there four gospels. As many of us know, the four gospels, written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, are similar but different. Father Izzy suggested remembering their themes by the “Four M’s.” Matthew writes about our Lord’s majesty, Mark’s gospel details how mighty He was, Luke focuses on His mercy, and John’s gospel is full of mysteries. Father also reminded us that although that is the order of the gospels in the Bible, Mark’s was actually the first one written.

I’ve previously learned that Matthew’s is the longest of the four gospels and that his account is very structured and rule-oriented. Matthew, we must remember, taught many of the Jews the Christian faith. His gospel is often considered the “heritage” of Jesus and consists of well-organized sections and includes “The Golden Rule.” Mark, on the other hand, taught non-Jews so his writings are very too the point and often suggested for youth and teens. He liked writing about the “good news” of Jesus but never mentions the birth of Jesus. Luke was a doctor and was very motherly. His gospel is all about Jesus’ powerful healing and love. Luke favored the lowly and his gospel reflects this in his encouragement and compassion. John’s gospel is different from the other three in many ways and he was very philosophical. It was the last gospel written and is an account of Jesus’ public ministry.

There are many books written on this subject and one could go on and on about the written word. Perhaps the best way to learn about the gospels is to read them and study them. That’s why they were written in the first place and that, my friends, is the gospel truth.

Flying back from our recent Christmas vacation I was listening to music on my IPod and on came Robert Earl Keene’s “I’ll Be There for You.” I was in a melancholy mood and the song struck me in an emotional way. It is the sweetest love song and listening to it made me think, “I wish someone would write or sing me a love song.”

That is so true. I’ve always been an admirer of great song lyrics but I was never a big hair band or Elton John fan because their lyrics were lame or made no sense to me. But, this girl from New Mexico discovered Bruce Springsteen way back high school because of his words. To me, he was (and still is) a lyrical genius. I had no relationship with the east coast at the time, but his words resonated with me. Still, I am not ashamed to admit I got down to many a disco song and have a host of Britney Spears hits on my ITunes. In short, I am a lover of music albeit not all music. My ITunes may have everything from “My Girl” to “My Fair Lady,” “Like a Prayer” to “Living on a Prayer, Petula Clark to Kelly Clarkson, rock ‘n roll to Kid Rock and all things country, but I’m not big on jazz, R&B, or hard-core, degrading rap. I do, however, appreciate the talent behind Eminem. I also don’t really get into Christian rock but I love a traditional church song. Go figure.

What is it about music? Certain songs are ingrained in our memories. Whenever I hear the song “Never Been Any Reason” by Head East, I immediately think of driving to Stillwater from Norman during college with my friend Lynn. We did it one time and undoubtedly heard several songs on the way, but that one stuck. I have no idea why. So very many songs can instantly remind me of a person or place…from years ago…I’m not talking weddings, first dates, or amazing trips. I’m talking driving to Stillwater! I also know the words to countless songs but can’t tell you what I ate for breakfast two days ago or some of my best friends’ phone numbers. Music is magical.

I have always loved music and it’s always been (excuse the pun) instrumental in my life. I still have my Partridge Family albums and I distinctly remember buying “The Best of Bread.” One of my fondest memories from high school is when I worked with the local radio station on a music montage for a big game against our rival team. I worked at the radio station in college and now I live in “The Music Capital of the World.” Sadly, even though I can sing, I can’t play a lick on a guitar or piano. I feel a New Year’s Resolution coming on!

When we first moved to Austin 27 years ago, Smitty and I were frequent attendees of live music events, near or far, big or small. When I made the decision to leave the TV news industry, the first job I took was that of Publicist at The Frank Erwin Center. To this day, it was probably the most fun and favorite job I ever had…perhaps tied only with my first TV job in Oklahoma City. I “had” to work every concert and promote the likes of Cher, U2, George Strait, Bon Jovi, and yes, Bruce Springsteen. What was not to love?! I was in heaven.

Times have changed. I became a mom and the job didn’t quite fit my new mommy schedule. Austin has grown increasingly bigger and more crowded so events are often more of a hassle than a pleasure. Smitty and I have gotten older so the club scene isn’t what we look for in our social life. We still love a live show every now and then, have passed on our love of music to our daughter Kristen, and I’m proud to say her taste in music is more often than not, quite good!

Yes, Kristen is a music devotee but sadly her ITunes generation will never know the joy of reading liner notes or A and B sides. Today’s kids like music, but things are still different. I will never forget visiting Open House at her high school at the beginning of her freshman year. We were in her ACE class, which was a first semester mandatory “learn the ropes of high school” course, and her teacher told us not to be alarmed if our high schoolers study with music on…”it’s what they do” he said. He was right. Kristen, to this day, studies with her earphones on and my country music-loving girl prefers Red Hot Chili Peppers during college finals prep!

This may not be the case with everyone though. My co-worker Ana recently told me about her son Max’s school research project in which he studied the effects of different types of music on someone while reading. Surprisingly, the project wasn’t for a music class, but AP Biology. Apparently music is a science!

To me, it will always be simply a love. A love of lyrics put to a rhythm that touches your soul and can sometimes even change your life. Who, after all, can argue with “Blow away the dreams that break your heart. Blow away the dreams that tear you apart. Blow away the lies that leave you nothing but lost and broken hearted?” Sounds like good advice to me. As a matter of fact, sounds like music to my ears.

It’s dominated the national news for the past few weeks, and here in Austin it’s been non-stop talk and literally hit home. It, is the Lance Armstrong scandal. And yes, it is a scandal…a huge one. I’ve had time to think about it and am finally ready to write how I feel.

Although I live in Austin I wouldn’t call myself a huge Lance fan. Don’t get me wrong, I admired him and thought highly of him, but I wasn’t one of those sporting yellow spandex. I did, however, purchase yellow “Livestrong” bracelets and I remember going with friends and family to a parade in honor of Armstrong in downtown Austin after his first Tour de France victory. Kristen was little but knew the enormity of the event. She and her friends were proud to hold up their homemade posters as Lance and his wife Kristen waved to the thousands along the Congress Avenue parade route. Austin was proud and so were we.

Soon after, and as Lance continued to win Tour de France after Tour de France, you couldn’t escape him or his name in Austin. Those cute little pink flamingos people put in their yards? In Austin, they were yellow and yes I bought one. “Lance Armstrong Bikeway” was officially named and you really couldn’t drive anywhere without running into cyclists probably pretending they were Lance. So many people began riding bikes in Austin that the City of Austin created a new Bicycle Coordinator position. People flocked to Armstrong’s “Mellow Johnny’s” local bike shop (the name is a take on “yellow jersey” in French) and bike lanes began popping up everywhere.

Then, seemingly overnight, Lance and his wife Kristen filed for divorce. Rumors spread that he had been the furthest thing from a good husband. He began dating singer Sheryl Crow and was turned Hollywood. He became a baby daddy. But, he continued to win, even as doping charges became louder and louder, and we all continued to cheer him and believe him. Maybe the real dopes in this doping scandal were really us.

Armstrong adamantly and consistently denied all accusations, and now as we all know, was flat out lying. He sued good friends and supporters who he knew were telling the truth! Narcisstic is putting it mildly. I watched the Oprah interviews and was struck by his lack of humility. I naively thought he would appear more contrite and broken. When he applauded himself for not calling one of his former supporters “fat” even though he’d called her other degrading names, I thought to myself, “this guy still doesn’t get it.” As I sat in a doctor’s office the day after the interviews, the doctor himself, whose kids attend the same school as Armstrong’s kids, called him what I consider the most fitting word: a punk. With the exception of a moment or two, throughout the Oprah segments, Armstrong displayed the same arrogance that cyclists all over Austin do as they demand equality on the roadways but refuse to follow the laws of those very roads. The apples don’t fall very far from their bike-riding tree.

I also couldn’t help but notice the melancholy tone of his voice anytime he talked about Kristen. He seemingly admitted that she’s a Christian living a Christian life and he wasn’t and isn’t. What if he would have been the husband she deserved, had stayed with her, and had avoided the perils of fame and ambition? Maybe, just maybe, I wouldn’t be writing this.

Instead, we get a Lance Armstrong who arrogantly posted a Twitter pic of him relaxing in his Austin home amongst his 7 framed Tour de France yellow jerseys, even as the doping allegation heat was boiling around him. I remember seeing that pic and thinking “WTH Lance?” If I didn’t already know it before that, I knew right then and there he was indeed a punk.

Still, out of bad came good. The Lance Armstrong Foundation has helped millions and I hope will be able to continue to do so. My heart aches for the volunteers and benefactors whose lives he’s wounded. I also feel for his children as they tackle the horrific nightmare that their dad, who they held up so very high, is a cheat and a liar.

People will forgive him though. Hollywood will hold him up as another Charlie Sheen, Kristen Stewart or Lindsay Lohan. What about sports though? Will athletes feel the same? Sadly we live in a sports world filled with the likes of Barry Bonds, Marion Jones, Ryan Leaf, Michael Vick, and Kobe Bryant. They cry and we forgive. Our fan-filled memories are short-lived, mine included.

I don’t know if this will be the case with Lance Armstrong and I don’t know what I hope becomes of him. I do know I won’t be buying his book or any more of his lies. At the very least I think he should have to work to pay off the people whose lives he purposely damaged. And I don’t mean book tour and luxury locations speaking engagements work, I mean the bike department at Wal-Mart or picking up trash on Lance Armstrong Bikeway. Voluntarily doing these kind of things would impress me way more than 7 yellow jerseys.

So true: